Friday, September 11, 2015

Reflection on the High Holy Days

Given all that is happening globally this year, humanity collectively has lots more to do to bring the world to a better place. A reflective poem for Rosh Hashana (this Sunday eve):

My reflection

When I look into the mirror
I see the face of millions
looking back
at me

When they gaze at me
some may be able to see the reflection of
those who might care enough to look back
at them

And when they see me in them
And when I actually see them in myself
we both will know that our core images and essence
though slightly different-- in meaningful ways,
are really the same at the center

As I align my image with the other
And as they align their source with me
we will one day look into our mirrors
and see who we really are

Thursday, September 10, 2015

finding that life worth living

All the little nasties seem to happen at once.  Insurance companies hanging up on me, clients not showing up,  and everyone else wanting their own chunk of change. Taxes here, office rent there, and the tea box in the office is empty.  Oh, yes, the dog needs his rabies shots.

Those are only the financial stressors. I know they will stabilize - and I will get through this money crunch. I am able to stay focused and keep the worry within tolerable bounds. I remind myself, when I start chewing on those fears that at this very moment, I am okay. I keep breathing. I take another deep breath, and take the dog out for a walk.

Believe it or not, it does help. I recognize the things I can control, accept the things I cannot change and see the difference between the two. It's what people in 12 step programs call the serenity prayer and what I call radical acceptance.

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

hawaii was wonderful wish I were still there

The yoga, the food and the warm days and nights!

If only to be back there right now.

Now, if I can get into this site, I will be putting chapters from my book on "Depression? the last help you'll ever need" up here.

Needless to say, google does NOT make it easy to access my accounts.

Keep breathing.  I'm still around when I can get into this site!!!

Friday, December 19, 2014

Ahh, end of term and off to the warm beaches

Yes!  I am flying away to the big island tomorrow.  I have never been to Hawaii and not only am I going to this beautiful place, I am going to a yoga retreat.

What a wonderful way to heal from the continuous stresses of the now ending semester.  Sometimes the therapist truly must take good care of herself.

A week of quiet, healing yoga practices in one of natures most wonderful gifts will serve well to set me back on the path to being ready for another new year.

I am sending positive energy and good thoughts to everyone as we head into 2015.  I encourage myself to think kind and loving thoughts to move me into strength in the new year.

Monday, September 15, 2014

Seasons of California

It has been hot and beautiful.  The wind keeps the air moving - it's possible to forget all the external stressors - drought and fracking and the monster SUVs that make walking the dog a real challenge.

These beautiful days as California changes seasons are part of the reason we come to California.  And, yes, there are season changes.  It's a very subtle change that requires close observation.  The air smells different and the light changes.

When I first arrived, I experienced an odor that has become, an indication of the seasons - the heat of the summer produces an almost mechanical odor mixed with scents of greenery.  When autumn arrives the scent is another blend of crisp green as well as the scent of drying leaves. 

Immersing myself in this change requires a total awareness.  The changes of weather in the east make acknowledging these changes simpler - the falling leaves and the changing colors - while in California recognizing these seasonal changes demand a focus and total awareness - a wonderful lesson in mindfulness: observe, describe and participate.


Friday, September 12, 2014

Another new Year

In two weeks the year 5774 will end!

The Jewish Calendar begins with the harvest and the gathering of all the energies of the year so that we can not only assess the year that is just being completed and also look forward.

How can we better prepare ourselves for both our material growth - growing in relationships and in the skills we show to the world around us and our spiritual growth.

Taking time to acknowledge adventures of the year just ending and making way for the awarenesses we bring forward is powerful.  These days before the new year can  set in motion the tone for what is to come in 5775.

During the next few days I must maintain an awareness of what was satisfying in the activities of the past months and what will be necessary for me to discard in the year ahead.

Change is what life is about: change is inevitable, growth is optional.

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Arrgh! Another Password nightmare

Sigh.  Finally I'm back - even with all the obstacles to my talking about the challenges, joys and even small steps forward in this deep morass of technical challenges.

It's been a very satisfying Summer and now, moving into the third week of school, it is going to be a rich and challenging semester.  I love that I am being forced to learn a whole 'nother body of tools for supporting my clients.

Now, in the midst of enhancing my skills for a younger group of clients, I am getting to share this experience with my students.

It's so important to keep the neuropathways oiled and challenged - just another means of staving off diminishing intellectual brain power.

More pushups for the brain.

Saturday, August 2, 2014

Luscious Summer dishes

The tomatoes are reaching their peak.  The aroma of melons surrounds fruit stands and the tree ripened peaches reach out to me from each bin along my path. 

The stimulation of these smells and sights brings visions of gazpacho made with those yellow tomatoes and Persian cucumbers and the red onions.  Maybe a peach ice cream or even a plum tart - this is that time of year when walking through the farmers market is the adventure of August's bounty. 

Last December I took cooking classes in Vietnam.  My first Wednesday back in LA I went to the farmers market in Santa Monica and found ingredients I had used in Saigon and Hoian and Hanoi!  What a delight to learn that I could reproduce those dishes right here in LA.

Sunday's exploration of my neighborhood market brings me back to the richness of California farms and triggers pictures of the lovely dishes I've cooked in other parts of this world.

Surviving Summer Heat

All the thoughts of the easy, sunny days at the beach or hiking in the mountains are just lovely images for self-employed people.  Additionally the idea that woring for myself offers flexible time for vacation or even a massage is another myth with which I have been living this season.

I am teaching on-line from 10 am until 3:30 on Tuesdays (Pacific) then on Wednesday and Thursday I am in my private practice office while on Friday I am back on-line.  On Saturday I'm back in my office.  Busy is something of an understatement.  So what am I doing to get through this summer with a bit of sanity in place???

Mindfulness.  Yes.  Everyone can benefit from a bit of quiet breathing.  It may be boring to hear the same idea so often AND it works.  Sadly I don't have time to do the above described hiking or laying in the sun.  On the other hand, I am making time to sit five and six times a week. 

Here's a powerful and quick tool to help you get through your own impending Fall stress: 
Stop what you are doing (fixing breakfast, changing a diaper).
Take a deep, gentle breath, take another
Observe how you feel, your thoughts, just observe.
Proceed with what you are doing and hold the refreshed state of mind.

Friday, June 13, 2014

Integrity, truth, honesty

So here's the real issue: in learning the DBT skills I am teaching my clients, integrity is a fundamental quality everyone should adopt and I feel strongly that I am dealing with some issues of honesty.

The questions I hope my clients will address are the importance of being honest with oneself even if they are not happy with the information they confront. 

Integrity is a really precious commodity that many people do not understand.  I feel strongly that in order to manage the vulnerability we all carry, we must practice telling ourselves the truth.

My task now is to communicate the power of being honest with ourselves and being willing to take responsibility for this condition.  How can we consider ourselves reliable, trustworthy people if we are unable to be truthful and even more, if we are unable to be truthful with ourselves.

These are important concepts that we cannot expect other people to practice, if we are unable to practice them ourselves.