She's quiting. Again

That's what happens with my clients. It's hard work. They begin to feel a little stronger, better and even begin to experience a little joy and then life rears it's ugly head and it all feels too much. The desire to shop - not a little nickel dime shopping but some big thousand dollar splurges - or the urge to do some type of self harm - cut or burn - or the desire to break the three month sobriety all become overwhelming.

All of which is part of the process of getting better. Those urges will be there AND in order to continue the healing process my clients MUST sit with that awful feeling. The wonderful part of sitting with that awful urge is that they do survive the urge. Even when it is at its strongest and most painful, the client can choose to maintain her/his sobriety or her abstinence from the harmful behavior.

She or he is stronger for having sat with the urge and has even earned the right to be very proud of her or him self for taking such good care. Getting better is not easy and is not pain-free, but it can be very freeing and the client learns how to be proud of him/herself for such healthy behavior. Oh, yes, she got through that urge to break her sobriety and kept her next appointment.