Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Justified Anger and Breathing

So what would happen if, instead of acting on that impulse to call him another 14 times, you took a deep breath!  How would it feel if you did NOT respond to that awful emotional pain?

The real idea is that sometimes it is appropriate to get angry - when you see an injustice, it is appropriate to respond to your anger in a constructive way.  But if you anger is not justified, if you are angry at your ex's new partner because she has a partner and you don't, that's not a reason to stalk your ex.

Anger can be constructive.  Anger can help you focus and clearly reach that goal.  Sometimes the anger is so intense that there is no clarity in thinking.  That's when the breathing comes in.  It's important to remember you always have that very effective tool to help lower the intensity of those excruciating emotions.

Breath.  Think about not acting on that emotion.  Think about the steps you can take to sit with the anger until the intensity lowers enough so that you don't act on the impulse you're chewing on.

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